‘The Babysitter’ is why I drink vodka

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One of my favorite past times on a cold and windy October night, is curling up in my Detroit Tigers blanket (my hometown), have a plate of fat snacks, a nice vodka-based beverage and chillax while watching a silly horror or comedy movie.  With the new Netflix movie, THE BABYSITTER, I got a 2 for 1 special.  THE BABYSITTER tells the story of 12-year-old Cole, who’s overly coddled by his parents, dealing with bullies at school and has a “hot” babysitter named Bee.  One night, while his parents are away and he’s supposed to be asleep, Bee invites her BREAKFAST CLUB-inspired friends over for a game of spin the bottle, with Cole watching from the shadows.  The innocent game quickly turns into ***SPOILER ALERT*** a bloody satanic ritual.  After discovering he’s next on their list of human sacrifices, Cole must now fight to survive.

As the opening credits rolled, I nearly spit out my vodka-crangrape when I see McG listed as the director.  I don’t hate the guy the way a lot of people do, but I already know to judge this movie on a large curve.  The relationship between Bee and Cole is the heart of the movie, which I honestly didn’t expect.  Bee seems more like a cool older sister to Cole rather than his babysitter and the friendship between these drives the movie.  (Also, I want to point out that I had seen the movie THE BOY right before this movie so I was already in a shitty mood from the crap that I had just watched.  Lauren Cohen deserved so much better than that.)  Samara Weaving  played the role of  Bee to utter perfection.  The best way to describe Bee would be to imagine Mary from THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY but in a horror-comedy directed by McG that’s released directly to Netflix.  She really stole the movie.


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Robbie Amell doing what he does best

The rest of the cast was solid as well.  Robbie Amell was shirtless and murderous, my favorite combo, for most of the movie.  Bella Thorne plays the role of the slutty cheerleader. Shocking. Hana Mae Lee is the murderous Sonja and Andrew Bachelor plays John, the black fool guy. Ugh.  This was really my biggest issue with the movie.  John was essentially the black stereotype.  Loud, obnoxious, the weakest in the bunch, essentially discarded (why couldn’t Bee kiss him?) and the first of the main cast to get killed.  Unfortunately I’m not that shocked based on the tropes of the movie but… shit man, really?


For someone who wanted laughs and blood in one movie, THE BABYSITTER, delivered.  It was more bloody and violent than  I expected going in.  Some of the deaths were down right inventive and boasted some pretty gnarly special effects.  The humor also felt natural and refreshing for this movie.  There are times where McG goes over the top, but this movie’s over the top moments felt fun and someone plausible.   Again, outside of the black guy stereotype, I really enjoyed this movie.  My 4 vodka-crangrapes had no bearing of my overall opinion of this movie.  It’s a fun flick to watch when you’re chillaxing at home with your friends… or Svdedka.

*** out of 4



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