Oh No! Why Did The Cute One Have To Die? Vol. 5

An age old common criticism of horror movies, especially slashers, were that they were seen as a platform that exploited young women in peril. More offensively, their strength or lack thereof, was rarely a deterent from seeing them drop trou only to be pursued by masked killer in the next scene. Historically, it seems that horror movies were made deliberately for the gaze and pleasure of young, heterosexual men. Until accessibility to the internet became so easy and common, slasher films in particular, served as a pornographic gateway drug to onscreen nudity and sex. Since these films were often made with the adolescent straight men in mind, women’s bodies were usually front and center. However for gay men it wasn’t the gratuitous female nudity that helped entice us to watch these films- it was the male eye candy we knew was coming. It wasn’t always the bad-boy villain or the final boy standing that was usually the hottest. It was, unfortunately, the guy in the wheelchair who died as he’s takes a machete to the face or the guy killed as after he escapes an Eastern European hostel. These are the times when I yell, “but why did the cute one have to die?” For this series, I’m highlighting the hottest guys in horror who met an early demise and let the final girl have all the fun.

Michael B. Silver (Luke in JASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY; 1993)

my new plaid pants: All The Friday Fellas

JASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY is absolutely, positively the worst installment in the FRIDAY THE 13th franchise. Creating an entirely new mythos around Jason Voorhees after 8 movies, for what was supposed to be the final film, was a case of too much too late. Still, JGTHTFF wasn’t a complete loss. Leslie Jordan and Rusty Schwimmer scene-stealing husband and wife duo, Steven Williams iconic Creighton Duke and Freddy’s Krueger’s cameo to name a few. The film’s criticism is that the film is too different from the previous Friday entries. The only scene that felt like a true FRIDAY film involved 3 campers meeting their demise. Michael B. Silver is the only male camper but he also makes up for the series deficit of male nudity. His boyish charm and good looks makes him a standout in this, otherwise, dismissive sequel.

Edwin Hodge (Dante Bishop in THE PURGE: ELECTION YEAR; 2016)

Edwin Hodge and Mallory Jansen Head into the Bermuda Triangle for ABC Pilot  "Triangle" - Bloody Disgusting

While his younger brother Aldis Hodge is the fantasy of almost every man and woman alive, lets not sleep on Edwin Hodge, nor his dimples. Hodge, who was the best thing about the first PURGE returned for the next 2 follow ups as Dante Bishop. His infectious smile and commanding performance made his death in the third PURGE even more tragic.

Osric Chau (Teddy in SUPERHOST; 2021)

Superhost' review: 'Psycho' for the influencer generation

SUPERHOST is absolute thrill ride the follows two YouTubers as they’re reviewing a lakehouse for their latest video. Osric Chau plays one half of the vlogging couple who quickly suspects something is off with their weekend host (played with delightful insanity by Graci Gillam). Chau’s deep dark eyes and guy next door looks kept my eyes are easy to get lost in but it’s his charming performance that helps undercut the brutality of the film.

Vardaan Arora and Adrián Favela (Gary and Luis in WRONG TURN; 2021)

WRONG TURN (2021) | SPACE JOCKEY REVIEWS

The WRONG TURN reboot was a welcome change of course for this never ending franchise. The new film included a gay couple who, refreshingly, didn’t feel shoe-horned in to appeal to the incels like the lesbian couple in WRONG TURN 4: BLOODY BEGINNINGS. Gary and Luis, played by Vardaan Arora and Adrián Favela respectively, not only bring some levity and humor to the film but both are incredibly hot. While their individual deaths were some of the best in the movie I couldn’t help but wonder what the course of the film (and franchise) would have been like to have a gay final boy instead of the usual final girl.

Devon Sawa- (Joseph Mersault in HUNTER, HUNTER; 2020)

HUNTER, HUNTER is a surprisingly effective, moody horror film that follows a family of fur trappers as they’re seemingly haunted by menacing wolf. Former teen idol Devon Sawa has grown into a strong and competent zaddy adult character actor who’s intense performance helps set the foundation of the atmospheric film.

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is 2ec65996-0978-4deb-a123-999b5f520fd4.jpg

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.